It’s that time of year again, when I look back at the last 12 months and realise, a little, just how much teshuva I need to make.
Probably, the people I really need to apologise to aren’t reading this blog anymore, but let’s put it out there anyway, that if I upset or offended or hurt anyone this year – I’m sorry!
And please forgive me.
As always, I’m a flawed human being, and the bad middot tend to come out in ‘high pressure’ situations…. like regular life in 2023.
BH, I am really hoping next year will be filled with more optimism and joy than the last year.
And I’m also hoping that God will help me to be at least a little better, and a little nicer, and a little more understanding and empathetic again in 5784.
I have to admit, this year took me out in a bunch of ways.
Behind the scenes, it’s felt like I’ve kind of veered from one ‘crisis’ to another, one ‘big deal’ to another, to another.
There have been weeks and months where I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed, so tired, so despairing of the world…
I have a theory that you have a ‘taste’ of your year to come in Elul.
BH, so far, Elul has been by far the best month of this last year – and I am starting to feel some cautious optimism that BH, we’ve turned some sort of spiritual corner.
So, please forgive me if I hurt or upset you this last year.
99% of the time it’s not deliberate, and the 1% of the time it was deliberate, you probably did something to provoke it, so I also forgive YOU whole-heartedly, too.
Ultimately, most of us are just doing our best, interspersed with those moments when our yetzers come roaring out from under the bed and just make a mess of everything.
Also, if you sent me an email and I didn’t respond, please also forgive me.
I have had weeks and months of total information overload the past year, and if your email landed when I was in the middle of one of those, I simply didn’t have the bandwith to respond.
It wasn’t personal.
If I made you feel bad that I didn’t come back to you, please forgive me.
BH, God should overlook all our shortcomings, and give us a great 5784 totally as an undeserved present.
And BH, may we all cut each other tons of slack, understand that we’ve all been through some very trying times the last 3-4 years, and turn the page on all the upset and harsh judgements, so the good times can finally start to roll.