A few years’ back, I discovered that it’s a big mitzvah for husbands to buy their wives jewellery before a major Jewish holiday, like Rosh Hashana, Pesach or Shavuot. I’m very machmir (stringent about keeping mitzvahs), so I told my husband to release his chequebook: it was time to go shopping.
As with most mitzvahs, it wasn’t so plain-sailing, at least at the beginning.
My husband came home with one duffo piece of jewellery after another: earrings that were way too big; a bracelet that literally drew blood; another bracelet that was very pretty, but looked like it was made of plastic beads (he’s still insisting they’re glass…)
And so on and so forth.
Last year, I decided I had enough of all the jewellery that wasn’t really ‘me’, and I decided I was going to pick my own stuff, and then just ask my husband to buy it. I picked a simple but very lovely bracelet and wore it happily for many months.
But then I realised something profound: each time my husband picked the jewellery for me, God used it to give me a clear message about where I was really holding in life.
The time I got the bracelet that was so sharp it drew blood, I was in a hyper-critical, judgemental mode of my life where ‘cutting remarks’ and ‘piercing comments’ were the order of the day.
The time I got the glass beads (that look like plastic) I was seriously conflicted about whether I should stay ‘real’ at all times, and thus be a lonely outcast, or whether it was OK, at least occasionally, to go into superficial, ‘plastic’ mode, so I’d still have someone (anyone…) to talk to.
The plastic beads showed up, and it took me a week or two, but then I got the message.
When I picked my own bracelet, it was gorgeous – but it was just jewellery. It didn’t have any deeper meaning attached.
So before Pesach, I told my husband he was free to buy me whatever he wanted (poor guy, talk about pressure) – so I added that I would LIKE whatever it was, and appreciate its inner dimension, even if I hated actually wearing it.
He showed up with a doozy of a bracelet.
Let’s be clear that it’s not my taste in about a million different ways, but because I let go of my ideas and cleared the path for God to send me what I really needed, God really responded in kind.
My husband told me the man in the shop had practically forced him to buy it (even slashing the price by 75% to fit our budget) and it was made with opal stones.
I have a gem book which tells you all the different properties of the many different stones, and this is what it said about opals:
“Opal amplifies traits and brings characteristics to the surface for transformation. Enhancing self-worth, it helps you to understand your full potential.”
This is what it said specifically about blue opals, like the ones in my bracelet: “Blue opal is an emotional soother that realigns to spiritual purpose. It resonates with the throat and can enhance communication.”
As I’ve written about elsewhere, I’d been having throat issues for ages, and the week before Pesach I actually lost my voice for a few days, so I was thrilled to bits with my blue opals.
I put the bracelet on for Seder night – and it’s barely left my wrist, since. Appearance-wise, it’s so not my taste. But God clued me in to the inner dimension of my jewellery, and as a result, I think it’s probably the best thing my husband ever bought me.