Sooooo, that last post I stuck up about ‘Standing up for God’ sparked off quite a discussion in the Levy household. My husband read it and told me: ‘That’s a bit strong.’
(If you know how Brits speak, you’ll know that this was a very dramatic statement to make.)
My husband is my biggest cheerleader generally, and my biggest supporter. And occasionally, he’s also my biggest critic. That’s not a bad thing, as I don’t pretend to be perfect, and without an editor policing my writing, it’s very possible that I can make errors of judgement in my posts and say things that would be better left unsaid (at least, by me.)
So I took his misgivings seriously, and we started to have a huge big discussion about whether I should be writing about that sort of stuff on Emunaroma. By the end of our long, stomach-wrenching conversation (because I was on shpilkes for a whole half an hour that I’d maybe just made a huge error of judgement) we came to the following conclusions:
1) My husband is very conservative, with a small ‘c’. (This was not a chiddush.)
2) Not for the first time, I’d shocked him by writing about things that many people believe should be left alone (again, this was also not a chiddush.
When I started writing about personality disorders three years’ back, we had the same discussion. And 15 years’ ago, when I was writing articles about corrupt figures in the orthodox world who were embezzling money from their charitable organisations, we had the same discussion.)
The irony is, in many ways I hate writing about all this potentially hyper-charged stuff because it literally keeps my stomach churning for days from anxiety that I’m doing something wrong by broaching these subjects. But God keeps pulling me back to the controversial stuff, no matter how hard I try to stay away from it all.
Which brings me neatly onto point number 3:
3) By the end of the discussion, it was clear to both me and my husband that God is actually very happy for people to be writing posts like the one I stuck up on Emunaroma last week. Far too many real issues are being squashed and sidelined in 2015, because of political correctness and nebulous concerns about offending people by telling uncomfortable truths.
Once we’d spent an hour drilling down to the foundation of what was really going on, it really boiled down to self-interest: my husband was worried that me going out on a limb by writing about gay marriage could potentially lead me into some choppy waters, and cause me unnecessary aggravation.
He’s seen me get mixed up in controversial issues before, and it’s not been a fun thing for either of us.
Aww, God bless him.
But there’s far more going on here than just what would suit me. Of course I’d prefer to write articles that bring me universal adoration, a huge (paying…) fan club and no concerns or issues whatsoever. But as a friend of mine put it so nicely, when God gives you an ability, that best way of saying ‘thank you’ is to use it the way God intended.
So the long and the short of it is, that I think I’m going to write a few more articles explaining why gay marriage is such a huge, pivotal issue for believing Jews, and why it really goes to the heart of whether you believe you’re really just an intelligent animal, or a Divinely-created spiritual being.
And then once that’s out the way, I can start posting up fluffier stuff again, that’s much easier to ‘like’ on Facebook.
To be continued…